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He failed, so he blamed.
“He didn’t complete this…she didn’t tell me that…it’s this department’s fault not mine”
His engineers pushed back, “but you didn’t tell me that” and “why’d you move the goal post?”
But every time he was called out…he’d blame his team and take no responsibility. (cue a collective sigh)
This was a continuous cycle.
The team grew resentful and whispered to each other, “he’s impossible to work with.” and “he must be trying to sabotage me”
After being throw under the bus yet again, an engineering lead stood up and quit on the spot stating, “You want us to fail, we will never succeed under your leadership”
This leader is displaying what the Arbinger Institute calls being “in the box”
Here’s how they describe it:
When we're 'in the box,' we see others not as people with their own needs, challenges, and insights, but as objects that either help us or hinder us. Our perception becomes distorted, and we can't see problems - or solutions - clearly.
As engineers, it’s easy to focus in on the problems we solve and ignore the fluff around us - we’re inherently selfish, that’s what makes us good at our jobs. But that also makes us particularly vulnerable to this phenomenon. When we’re in the box we betray out natural sense of honor, that self-betrayal leads to blaming, self-preservation and looking for faults in others only.
Consider this:
Engineers that are “in the box” often:
Dismiss ideas from certain team members without evidence
Blame the impossible or unrealistic instead of finding solutions
Defend out approach even when evidence suggests otherwise
Prove we are right instead of helping the broader team
So Mr. Boss, unfortunately it’s you and not them. You being in the box is like a disease getting passed around throughout the company.
Eventually, this will prove to just not be working, that you’re the epicenter of it all, but when eventually is, no one knows.
The box isn’t logical. It’s insidious. It makes brilliant engineers ignore elegant solutions that don’t match their narrative.
So the next time you’re convinced a technical problem is unsolvable or a colleague is incompetent, ask yourself: “Am I seeing this situations clearly, or am I in the box?”
Then, reframe, rephrase, and reassess. Innovation only happens when we climb out of the box.
-Brad
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